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Nigeria, wedding is largely seen as an expensive venture, as it is done
in three stages, the first being traditional wedding (or engagement)
the second being the formal aspect, whether in church, mosque or at the
registry, and the third being the reception
Arguably, wedding has always been one of the ceremonies that people
cherish most, and it’s one of those that probably won’t go away for the
rest of time.
Its significance is not just because it formally heralds the
beginning of a matrimony, although that is significant, it is also
because it is an important event that the people taking part in it are
fully aware of.
In christening, though the baby is alive, he or she may not be
totally aware of the hapenings around them, while the dead are assumed
to be unaware of their burial ceremonies.
Interestingly, being a ceremony that marks the beginning of a
lasting togetherness, the way and manner people go about it depends
largely on the culture and tradition of the area they, especially the
woman, hail from.
On a cursory look at the way wedding ceremonies are held in some
other climes, while it is capital intensive in some, it is purely
ceremonial and cultural in some places and yet in some other places, it
is held briefly. Also, in some places, it is a one-day event but in some
other places, it is multi-day event, each with its attendant cost.
For example, in Japan, the bride is painted pure white from head to
toe and she and the husband become husband and wife once they drink
sake (Japanese rice wine) together. In Jamaica, wedding is a community
affair as everyone comes together to help in the planning and they all
gather to see the bride and they assess her outfit.
In Germany, the ceremony is done in three parts and it is capital
intensive, while in Cuba, it is an expensive ceremony and any male guest
who dances with the bride is expected to pin money to her dress to help
the couple pay for their honeymoon.
However, in Nigeria, wedding is largely seen as an expensive
venture, as it is done in three stages, the first being traditional
wedding (or engagement) the second being the formal aspect, whether in
church, mosque or at the registry, and the third being the reception.
While the traditional is seen as sacrosanct, the third stage, which
is hosting people at a reception, seems to be the most expensive. And
because of the cost of the ceremony, some people delay or shy away from
wedding.
But there is good news. Experts say it is possible to have a
beautiful wedding that won’t be too costly and won’t appear cheap or
pedestrian. An events planner, Miss Oluwatamilore Adeyemi shares some
tips that could help people save cost:
1. Cut down the number of guests: It has been
established that the number of guests or invited persons determines the
size of the hall, the quantity of the food to be prepared, the quantity
of drinks and the number of souvenirs, which would influence the amount
spent eventually. This is the view of Adeyemi, as she adds that people
who truly want to cut cost would limit the number of the persons they
would invite and that leaving it open-ended would not do any good.
She adds, “I realise that most people want to impress and make a
statement during their wedding. If you truly want to cut cost, there is
no reason why you should have a wedding that is over 500 guests,
because more guests make you spend more. If you are making food for 400
people, it’s cheaper than making food for 1,000 people. And a hall that
would take 1,000 persons could cost about N1.5m, whereas a hall that
would accommodate 250 guests could go for about N120,000. Look at how
much you have saved. So, the first thing to do is to reduce the number
of your guests.”
She stressed that it is better to have fewer guests that would
enjoy the programme than having large number where majority would be
dissatisfied or disgruntled. “So, the rule is, cut down on your
guest list and invite only those that actually matter. “If the cost of
food per person is N1,000 and you have 150 persons, you would only spend
N150,000, but if you have 1,000 guests, you would spend N1.5m on food
alone. Those whose presence you want to enjoy should be the ones at your
wedding. And it also affects what you would spend to get a band,
because the larger the hall, the more you would pay as they would have
to bring more speakers and that tells on your fees too.”
2. Be flexible about the day: The director of
Bridal Consultants in the US, Dena Davey, said people should consider
fixing their wedding on other days apart from Saturday, the usual day,
so as to save cost. She said events hall managers also tend to charge
more on Saturday than other days. But Adeyemi disagreed.
She said, “I don’t agree because at the end of the day, people
that really matter to you may not be able to attend, and it would look
as if you are cutting them off, except you are sure that those people
would all be on leave. The ideal time for a party is weekend when
everybody is free.” She said instead of holding it during the week,
to save cost, people could explore the option of takeaway food, like
serving them while coming from the registry as it removes the cost of
hall, music band or hiring a disc jockey.
She said, “You could have a small thanksgiving in a hall;
dance, eat and enjoy yourselves. The truth is that people don’t really
enjoy themselves at a wedding; they are so stressed and they are busy
catering to people who have not eaten that they miss the fun at the end
of the day.”
3. Do some things yourself: Notably, one of the
things that gulp money while planning for a wedding is invitation cards;
not just the distribution, but the cost of printing them. Adeyemi said
that, generally, invites are overrated and that on the average, one
could cost between N500 and N1,000. She, however, advised that people
could use e-invite; write a letter and send by mail, or prepare an
access card, which she said could cost as low as N100.
She said, “Except you are really buoyant, then I think people
should cut down on what they spend on cards. People assume that the
beauty of the invitation card says a lot about their financial status,
so at the end of the day, it’s all about showing off. You can save that
money.”
4. Don’t seek to impress: From observation, one of
people’s motivations when it comes to wedding planning is to impress
and show people that they are well to do. But Adeyemi said that is not
necessary.
She said, “Invite the people you can cater to and let them have
food to eat. You could have agreed with the caterer that it’s one plate
of food and two proteins per person, to avoid shortage. If you are
inviting 200, make food for 350. It’s better to have excess than
shortage. It is not a must to buy alcohol, if you think it would shoot
up your budget.” Also, she said instead of inviting an artiste, people could just call a DJ or a small band. “With either of the two, have a good time, dance with your parents and friends.”
5. Talk to a credible event planner: It would
appear that one good way to have a beautiful, low-cost wedding would be
to talk to an event planner, who would help to reconcile the couple’s
expectations with what their budget could cover. Adeyemi said this
should come after both families have agreed on what they want, adding
that even though people run away from engaging the services of event
planners, erroneously thinking they couldn’t afford it, taking that step
is the way to go.
She said, “The planner would tell you the best venue that would
save you cost in terms of logistics. For example, you could get a venue
in Magodo for a higher price, but the logistics and the decoration
could be cheaper due to access, while a cheaper hall in Abule Egba could
attract higher cost of logistics and decoration.
"So, talking to a planner helps to put things in perspective
and save cost. She added that a caterer or professional event planner
would also make use of professional security personnel to keep away
miscreants and other unwanted persons. Just as Davey suggests that such
persons should consider using open spaces, parks or beaches, to avoid
paying for halls, Adeyemi said for any event in an open space, there
should be provision for security."
6. Your planner doesn’t have to be a family member:
Perhaps, one way people run into ‘trouble’ during their wedding is when
they give certain duties to unqualified family members. Findings show
that this does not only lead to avoidable quarrels, it constrains the
couple to accept things as they are so as not to offend family members.
She said, “Once family members are in charge, you could be
looking at a flop, because they would take care of themselves and their
own and there is a limit to how you could speak to them. But a
professional would ensure that everybody gets a fair, equal treatment
and not that someone would just come and ask for 10 pieces of meat.”
She stressed that it is lack of planning and mismanagement that oftentimes brings about shortage. She added,
“In Nigeria, we expect family members to do things for us, even when
they are not competent. And that is why things flop because you don’t
employ the professionals. A caterer is conscious of a next time, so him/
he or she would serve you well so you could recommend him/her to
others.”
-PUNCH
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