Hehehe...Any relationship outside of marriage
where an illicit romantic or sexual relationship occurs is an
extramarital affair. To keep such relationships secret, the parties
involved usually develop the skill of deception and duplicitous
negotiation, according to marriage counsellors. Since illicit
relationship is a phenomenon so rampant, Fidelis Chidi blog asked
some people what they would do if they found out their parents were
romantically involved with their father or mother-in-law
I’ll caution the two parties
Governor Lucky
It’s absolutely an insane thing to hear
and it makes me want to believe such a thing can never happen, or
probably if it happens, it cannot be heard from my family. I am not
trying to boast but I know my parents so well that they can never do it.
It’s an abomination and perhaps if it happens, I will talk some sense
into my parent who is involved in the affair. I would remind either of
them of the morals and norms of the society – perhaps they have
forgotten about it. It doesn’t make sense to me.
Be it unto them as they want
Blessing Okonkwo
Since they are both adults and know what
they want, it is none of my business to peek into their private lives.
If they like themselves, let them go on, but I know that there will come
a day when they will be tired of themselves and would wish they had not
indulged in it. It is not in my capacity to make them repent. If they
like, they should; if they like, they shouldn’t. There comes a day when
they will be unable to run away from their evil way and cry out for
help.
None of my parents can do that
Olagunju Olawale
Maybe it happens in some other parts of
the world, but I think Nigerians are too shameful to indulge in such a
thing. I don’t rule out the possibility of it happening, but I think
it’s only people who are given to the devil that would practise such. As
for my parents, I have a 100 per cent confidence in them that they dare
not indulge themselves in such an illicit affair. It is ungodly,
immoral and unheard of. What is it that my parents could have wanted
from an opposite partner that they had not gotten from themselves? I
will tell my parents to quickly disengage from the insane act and
repent. However, like I said, I trust my parents; they are too ‘big’ to
do such a thing.
I won’t forgive my parent
Diepreye Isaac
That’s how spouses divorce themselves.
What sort of ungodly act is that? Even if one does not have both parents
again, is it not better to re-marry than date my in-law? It’s an insult
to the family and I will not be comfortable with that. After
counselling my parent to stop the affair, I will give him or her a
period of grace to see whether they have repented. If not, I may decide
to keep the secret because it’s not from me that people would hear such
thing. However, I will find it difficult to forgive my parent for
cheating on their spouse.
It’s their life, I’ll leave them
Cleo Prizzy
Which type of child cautions his parents
for doing a wrong thing? I don’t think we have such a culture. If I try
it, I could make them pronounce negative words into my life. They could
question my audacity and bring me to book. I think as a young man, I
have my life to live than poking nose into the affairs of an elder who
knows what is good for him/her and can differentiate the right from the
wrong. I will rather focus more on what I want to achieve in my life and
let the old guys do whatever they want. Whenever they are tired of the
act, they would leave themselves.
Such an affair leads to destruction
Oluwaseun Alagbe
There is no one that engages in an
illicit affair that doesn’t get burnt eventually. They could enjoy their
moments for the time being, but later when their eyes become open, they
would realise how much destruction they’ve caused themselves. It’s not
my responsibility to caution them or else I could get burnt in the
process with them. I’ll leave them to do whatever they want to do with
themselves. When they are done, they will separate.
I’ll warn my in-law
Chibuzor Isaac
It is an abomination of the highest order
and as a person, I will not take it lightly. In fact, on the day I find
out about the affair, I will call my in-law first and warn him or her
before I deal with my parent. That kind of thing can affect the future
of the family and can have a boomerang effect on us that know or know
nothing about it. A day will come when the cat would be let out of the
bag and both of them would be ashamed of themselves. However, if I am
privy to the affair, I will take it up and let them dissolve the
relationship secretly before it becomes an open thing later.
I’ll call a family meeting
Owei-Tongu Amaebi
A family meeting will be the solution to
the issue. If only I find out, they could seek some means of silencing
me due to the fear that I may make the affair public, which is what I
will actually do. I will not be silent when my parent is involved in an
illicit relationship with my in-law. What an abomination! To help them, I
will discuss the issue with one or two people and from there, we can
take it up together, but I’m going to make sure I’m not the only person
who has the knowledge of the affair.
I’ll tell my other parent
Adebayo Adekunle
That kind of affair marks the beginning
of evil in the whole family. One day, their act would be exposed and it
would cause a strain in the relationship of both families. People who
never knew of the affair would know about it and tag us with a bad name
in our family. I will try my best to prevent all these from happening by
speaking to the two parties – my parent and my in-law. If they refuse
to stop, I will tell my other parent and if they still refuse to stop, I
will tell a person from my in-law’s family and from there things would
be worse for them. I hope they repent before it gets to that level,
though.
My spouse and I would decide what to do
Godwin Alaere
It’s a complicated situation and so many
things would prop up in my mind. I wouldn’t know whether to inform
someone else or confront my parent or in-law. It’s going to be difficult
whatever decision I want to take. However, I’ll love to keep quiet and
see the situation of things before I make my final decision. Based on
what I see, I would inform my spouse about the affair. Whatever decision
I take, I hope it doesn’t generate into a crisis between both families.
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